Is it possible to know immediately that the person you have just met is ‘ the one ‘?

Sure not.Come on say, you can find someone very attractive right away and experience a click, but it has to come from two sides. Even if so, it is only to wait if that is still the same after three months or three years.

The problem is that in infatuation there is a drug in your system that makes it impossible to make a realistic estimation of the man or woman in question.

Yes, from our evolution it has proven to be effective to have such a sensor, and we have therefore been successfully selected… Not so.

There is absolutely no reason to assume that there is such a thing as ‘ the one ‘.

There will be such a thing as a “ah, this is possibly a good fit” light.

You can not know that.You can feel right at best. However, that is not a guarantee. Many relationships run, including the relationships that start with a mutually good feeling for each other.


The person you have just met is not “the one”.Real love grows between people, and requires continuous adjustments on both sides. The one you fall in love with today is not the same with which you still live together about 10, 20, 50 years. Love is the process of going through life together, not (as with clothing) of searching for what suits you best now.

In The relationship psychology the term “collusion” was introduced by the Swiss psychologist Jurg Willi.Willi has characterized a number of relationship types based on this notion. The best translation allows itself collusion as matching the partners as key and lock. The other is for the other “the one” and vice versa.

This collusion has particularly unpleasant consequences, because hereby compensates the one the psychic self-deficient of the other (unconsciously) and vice versa.With the development of the relationship, one of the partners will, as a rule, try to break the collusion. For both partners, she has the rather unhealthy consequence, that one always has the responsibility for the deficient of the other. So the deficiencies remain unresolved. This leads to crooked and relationship-internally very uninvigorating conflicts.

The broader the collusion in the relationship is laid out, so how to fit the key and lock, the more violent it will “pop” in the relationship.Often, a termination of the relationship will result, either a very fruitless relationship in which the division of labour is central and the love is beaten dead.

So, if you feel like “the one”, it is of utmost importance to stay and feel good, why the other is “the One” for you. Is that because of collusionary motives, or because the other one confronts you with your own deficiencies so that you have to work from the outset and also on working and vice versa?Only the last form has a healthy chance of succeeding.

Doubt it.

Personally, I always have to get to know someone better before I make an opinion.

Our daughter did so by first chatting online with her current partner (now 11 + years together), before they first met in real life, the Atlantic Ocean sat between them. But after this first meeting, both of them knew for sure, they heard together.How it was necessary to have them as young as they were (19 -21 years old) completely self-selected, and for each other, that he as a good programmer after 2 years of having pulled it, during the summer holiday interview after interview expire in search of a Employer-Sponsor a visa and work permit as a knowledge migrant see the Immigration and Naturalisation Service (IND) , since then they are very happy together.Hats off to these two, their bond with each other is also very special, they have invested a lot in each other.

Our son certainly knew his current girlfriend for 3.5 years as fellow office mate, shared an office space with her, so knew who he started when he decided to ask her.Also this seems to be very good clicking.

In summary, in our family we are reasonably rational when looking for the permanent partner, taking sufficient time to learn each other seems practical, not immediately too hard to walk and lose your head, so it does not work with us.

Maybe not immediately “the one”, but I can say quite quickly if a woman is a potential “the one”.

Yeah I think so.If you are young and unhindered by annoying experiences, both able to shape life together.

I do not believe that.Although you can have a very good feeling with someone immediately, there are too many examples of people who had that and eventually turned out to be mistaken.

People change during a relationship, and it is M.I. impossible from the very first moment to know what will happen in your future and that you will endure that with his two.

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