People who are truly self-assured (and therefore not arrogant, or in any other way Veinzen self-assurance) are often due to positive experiences in life.They have already done something similar, and know that they are making a good chance of being able to meet this new challenge.
If you don’t feel so confident about your business, then a good way to get more confident is to look back in your past, where you also had to deal with a similar challenge and where you managed to bring it to a good end.Or not, but where you did know why it went wrong.
I stutter.That is a decent handicap, when you-like me-give training to groups of people. So when I decided to start with it, I felt absolutely not at ease. It had of course been easy, just to set ‘ Hey, I have a limitation, so I shouldn’t do this ‘.
But by just thinking about situations where I am not or less stutter, I came to the conviction at some point, that with a small group of clients I already knew I would have no problems giving a training.
The group grew bigger and the customers became more and more ‘ unknowns ‘ as my self-confidence was growing.
Incidentally, there is also a big difference between self-assurance and self-confidence.
Self-assurance is on the outside, self-confidence on the inside.It is the confidence I have gained in myself, which makes me more confident.
And over the years I have spoken a lot of people who regularly stand for large groups, a lot of people get that confidence only when they reach the stage.Before that, they almost do a pants full of nerves;))
Good or bad are concepts that do not apply to this.But you can say that it is not very sensible. People are quickly poking through that.
It remains prudent to just do who and what you are.People accept that and appreciate it too. This will give you more confidence and you will also grow your self-assurance. Only now is it real and hear it with you.
We call this a positive loop.So there are more positive cycles where you really get better from it. Good friends There is also such a.
My tip: Find the positive cycles and leave the rest on the left!
If I involve myself, I have 2 answers to this:
- In some cases, it is good to pretend to be a strong and confident person, even if you are not.
In the third and fourth Grade I was severely taunted/bullied because some guys got the idea that I was gay and this gossip was going around the school as a fire. This has, to this day, been extremely hard. At the times when I almost no longer pulled it, I was very thankful to myself afterwards that I was able to always be confident about it, have a big mules and make vililinear remarks back, while I hated deep inside every aspect of myself and a min Complex was still an understatement. This fake confident attitude has saved me during my further high school time.
At the end of the ride you’ll lie down and you won’t know what it’s about to make you vulnerable. A few years later, in my student age, I no longer knew how to be vulnerable to people who were close to me, because of the defence mechanism I created. This has eventually led to a few nasty relationship fractures.
All in all, it is my experience that if you keep stopping your defense mechanism for too long, you will suffer.Yet I do not regret at times the self-assured guy to have hung out. I am also just a human being.
If you really manage to get confident, and therefore strong, to come over it is smart!People like to pick up the weak to get their dissatisfaction out of something. I am totally not confident and very passive and very afraid of other people. I can’t act so I’m often the pineut. And whether it should be heard that I “look weird” or that I “walk wrong”; It touches you anyway and only makes it more fearful for people, so I tighten myself in a circle of fear and the chance to become even more “bullied”. I have already done many courses to act on self-assurance, but I just don’t succeed, partly because of autism.
However, many people think they are acting confidently; But you fall extra through the basket when it turns out that it is not. Then you can become an even bigger target for others.
I think the reason why you want to do it as self-assured is very much.If it is to be bothered less quickly it is smart; Especially in this stress society full of short fuses and extreme sensitivities. If it is so that others find you nice it is useless (then they find a non existent character Nice). If it is to enforce respect it is “bad” (Little Loser Behavior). Respect you must earn. And so you can think of many scenarios.
And well, what is good and what is bad?I do understand what you mean with regard to your question. But because the reason you do it is not known the question is quite difficult to answer.
Be yourself.Then you pull the right people towards you and then you get what you deserve. People quickly pierce through it when you play a roll.
Sometimes, if you want to see for sure and that people don’t dare to do tough.But you should always be your self whatever happened???