Is it advisable to give your partner and yourself the time and both to temporarily live somewhere else if you have spent a lot of time in conflict?

Out of the eye, out of the heart.A short time-out can be useful in a heated discussion, but that’s a lot different from divorced living.

Escape as Style

What emerges from the question is that you are inclined to look for a style called ‘ escape ‘.This is the style with the lowest form of collaboration. It is not admitted, nor is it being pushed through and no compromise is sought.


A solution to a conflict is always a negotiating process.Negotiation is a mix of fighting and collaborating. Since you are not working together, by avoiding, you are also not negotiating a solution.

If you want that solution of the conflict, then it is not advisable to live seperated.

However, a solution should be possible.This depends on how far the conflict has escalated.

Forms of escalation

If there is limited destruction or worse, negotiation does not make sense.It is more sensible to end the relationship. There is no more willingness to invest in the relationship.

If there is threat, face loss, image formation and coalitions, then negotiations can still be made, but it is necessary to get help from outside.This must be impartial aid, which does not form a coalition with one of the persons in the relationship.

If there is a question of hardening, polemics, deeds instead of words, there is still an eye for one another objectives and you can still come out of two.

About Escape and escalation

If there is a very intense emotional conflict, it is often an escalation on the verge of a threatening strategy or a limited destruction action.After all, you are at risk and at the moment you actually continue it is already a limited destruction. Realise that in these cases there is a high risk that the relationship is over for good. After all, the moment you do not run it means losing sight and at the moment you do it, it is destruction.

When the conflict is even less escalated, the escape can also be a style that suits face loss.The conflict is already very emotional.

If the escalation is still at rational level and there is little escalation, then it can also be a form of escalation in the sense of deeds no words, however, realize that the risk is high that the conflict escalates further and becomes emotional, without Outside assistance will no longer come together.


Depending on whether you can still look at it rationally or are very emotional, in both cases it is unwise to live separately.However, if there has been limited destruction, destruction of the other, or the abyss together , it is very sensible not only to live separately, but also to put the relationship in its entirety.Realizing that escape, in this case divorced living, can also fit in with the escalation of the Abyss together (the most severe form of escalation), but then it is not temporary anymore.In that case, you literally put a point behind the relationship.

No, it’s more advised to find out what makes you happy, without needing your partner, the same for your partner.Do those things separately or together, but make sure that you wish you happier, the same for your partner and do things that you all love to do. You don’t have to go apart, together sometimes, alone can certainly and occasionally things you may not like to do But if geste for your partner does anyway.

Yes give the other time to formulate the almost inevitable conclusion that it is better to go only further.Be nice, do accomodating.

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